I Am Sixteen Going on Seventeen

You are sixteen going on seventeen
Baby, it’s time to think
Better beware, be canny and careful

“ Sixteen Going On Seventeen” from The Sound Of Music

I couldn’t lie as it’s actually a “plus ten” to the above ages.

Being an organized thinker is always a challenge to me but at that same time very essential as a good blogger. This year is very reflective. It was the beginning of the pandemic time when I turned twenty-six. Never would I have thought that this pandemic has lasted for more than a year, and very likely, it is not going to end soon.

Sometimes I went back to my old post – “After The Quarter-Life Crisis, What’s Next?”, to see how much I had achieved a year ago and what was my plan and future goal. I found it very useful to motivate myself to go further by seeing all those progress. Because of this, I am going to make another wrap-up article about my twenty-six and the upcoming plan for my twenty-seven.

What have I done in my twenty-six?

1. I worked so hard and OT a lot for the company — 
   Honestly, I did have the best manager and many like-minded coworkers back then. I was the fortunate one who was given a lot of opportunities at work, spent most of my time working day and night, at home and in the office. However, it’s the nature of work and the organisational structure that makes me feel sick. It’s normal for a company to be goal-oriented, but because of what I learned in uni about the importance of rewards & recognitions, I couldn’t really see that from the top management. They couldn’t seem to recognize it by heart and they just ask for more. It was surprisingly hierarchical in a young company and people have the norm to please their bosses by impressing the fake side rather than expressing the real side. Nothing to deal with me personally but I just get sick of the culture of people working as a cow while nobody would have seen it. Well, the attitude of “noted with thanks”.
   
2. I quitted my job for a “go-abroad” plan to the UK — 
   Then I realized how bad I became… Was it the peer influence within the workplace or the failure of self-control? I started all kinds of bad behaviours that would affect my health: I stopped doing exercise because I couldn’t squeeze any time for it, I got addicted to staying out late at night for social and chill, I worked till 3 AM and messed up with my sleeping schedule. After half-year of planning, I decided to quit the job and take on a new challenge of going to the UK for a working holiday, and perhaps, do a master’s degree. I was so determined to do that to retune my pace of life and search for purpose in life. I had a great farewell and was celebrated with colleagues who I love and who love me too. I still miss them but life goes on. I did all the preparation work before I left, applied for the visa, took the IELTS, rented a place to live, updated my CV, opened an overseas bank account, etc. I was so blessed that everything went on the right track.
   
3. I spent most of my time with my friends and my mum — 
   In those 3 months of “domestic vacation”, I went to staycations and had my first camping experience. I spent a lot of time meeting close friends, gangs from my secondary school, community college, uni, first and second job. I like the diversity and dynamic of every single group I have. Some enjoy drinking a lot, some play pokers and mahjong, some are so fascinated in playing board games, some are my all-time sports gang, and some are just into intellectual conversations. I love them all so much. That’s why it’s always hard for me to prioritize friendship as they all are important to me. I happened to meet some old friends as well because they heard of my news and would like to catch up with me, I like the 1-on-1 quality chat so much. Then here comes the best part of my life, I finally took more time to stay with my mum and sis, I was finally there living in the moment with them, because I used to be with them while thinking about work all the time. I accompanied my mum to do house viewing, look for a place to rent and live, finally contributed something to the family. Sometimes I feel guilty because of how I decided to leave them for my own good. But after all, I do believe that everyone should be responsible for and take charge of their own life. I have strong faith in doing this. I will be back after I finish my adventure.
   
4. I became bold in expressing myself — 
   One prominent change I have at the age of twenty-six is definitely how courageous and thoughtful I have become. It’s not just about work, but also in a relationship. I risked my friendship with a person and told that person about my thoughts straight from my instinct and gut feeling. During that period of time, I always said to myself, “just do that before you regret anything, the opportunity cost is low, then do it.” It’s the best timing to let go of any obsessions that drag you down. Been there, done that, don’t try again dwelling on the past, it’s way too doomy and devastating.

What have I learned and realized this year?

1. Don’t sacrifice your health just because you are young — 
   Last November, during the peak time of work, I worked overtime most of the days and sometimes I would express it out on social media. There was one time, my ex-colleague texted me, this is what she said, 
   “working can be fun and working with like-minded colleagues is amazing. But please don’t think working overtime is normal and working till midnight earns a medal. We should not work like that. Your company won’t appreciate it. Just think deeply, why do you have to work till late? So stop this bad habit as it affects your health. You might feel fine right now, but when you get older, you might realize it’s too late.” Her words stuck in my mind for a couple of days, I even shared them with my colleagues so that we could remind each other to take care of our own health as this ex-colleague suffered from breast cancer and could tell a really convincing story from what she experienced. Not long ago, this ex-colleague passed away. She reminded me again a week before she left this world in a virtual chat. I still kept her words in mind and I am 100% sure I will never forget. Thank you. I know you are in another world, but this is one of the biggest things I learned at twenty-six. Thank you so much for inspiring me though we are now apart. I will keep your positivity going.
   
2. A full-time job is not the only income source you can have — 
   After I quitted, I tried to look for something meaningful to do. I started learning how to invest in stocks during the pandemic time and earned my first profit from it. Then that is the moment when I finally realized what does it mean by passive income and you don’t need to rely on a full-time job for earning money. It doesn’t have to be doing direct selling, which will scare your friends away. Instead of being brainwashed, there are a lot of other options like making an investment, writing blogs, being an affiliate, working as a freelancer, etc. There is even a job called search engine evaluator online. In this digital era, it gives you more flexibility in making a living. I did some Udemy courses about how to earn money by blogging or by freelancing. To be frank, I still haven’t made a penny nor completed all courses, but those courses on Udemy are surely worth it as you have lifetime access to it, which means you can go back and revisit the content whenever you want. Luckily I realize this at 26, well, not too old, not too young. Better late than never.
   
3. Do it now or never. Don’t give room for yourself to regret —
   If “better late than never” is a phrase that we use when we are at a point right before we start to regret something, then “do it now or never” is a phrase that we use when we still have plenty of time before we realize that we will regret. Right before I left my hometown, I knew that I won’t come back in a short period of time due to the unpredictable government restriction and lockdown rules. I planned for so many things like “what if my family is selling the flat in these two years while I am in the UK, who is going to pack my stuff?”, “what if I become so depressed when I am alone in the UK if I don’t let things out before I leave?”, “what if I can’t rent a flat for myself after I arrive?” With all those things questioning myself, I worked my ass off to make sure things can go smooth before I regret it. Actions speak louder than words, but my words used to speak louder as I am always procrastinating. I love that my willpower was quite strong during that time, I threw most of the unnecessary things like the old textbooks and notes from secondary school to university, decluttered packed things into boxes so my family could locate the stuff easily when I am not there, made a back-up of all my photos and documents in a secured drive and kept looking for jobs and flats to rent before I arrive, not giving room for myself to regret. So determined and I could stop at nothing.
   
4. It’s important to be mindful and live an abundant life — 
   These few months, I did feel like I have become more mindful of living in the moment. Not just because I have become more independent and mature since I started living in the UK, doing all the household chores on my own, cooking my own meals and buying my own groceries. As growing up with a maid since I was born, I am honest to tell that my survival skill of living alone is really low. That was one of the reasons why I would like to take on the challenge of exploring a new city on my own. I need this experience to make myself stronger and get out of the way of feeling lonely, instead, embrace aloneness. I have indeed become more spiritual, and in some way, superstitious. There was a time I went for a walk at the park, wandered through the streets and appreciated the views and the history of the town that I am currently living in. I was so mindful that I went back home in a happy mood. That was the time when I saw the email of having a confirmed offer from the company that I really would like to get in. Isn’t it when you feel confident or think positive about something, then that something will really go in your favour? There should be a thing called the Law of Attraction.

What’s next?

1. Put that long-term goal in mind — 
   Now that I secured a full-time job in the UK and applied for a master’s degree. Almost everything has settled here. I know leaving my family is very challenging and hard, they are old and you somehow blame yourself for not being able to stay with them. This is a huge dilemma in my mind. I have to keep reminding myself to think about this in long term. You are just sacrificing a few years, somehow it will enhance your relationship with them when you are not physically there as you have more topics to talk about through frequent virtual chats, then that’s okay. But for your future career, you know that you don’t want to turn your head back again, you are fed up with marketing and would like to try something new, then keep going for it, explore what is right for you. Just a few years, find your path, go your own way, then go back with your questions answered.
   
2. Don’t feel old and always believe in the law of attraction — 
   As I mentioned, the law of attraction is always here. Think positive, be clear-minded and have faith in everything is possible. These are the best ways of living to live the best version of yourself. It is not “nothing to lose” now, but at least, you still have room to lose and fail. Every successful person experiences failure. Be young, young in heart. Be mature, mature in mind.
   
3. Follow your instinct and go for the things you want — 
   Unless the opportunity cost is high, there is actually nothing to stop you from doing it. I should feel lucky because someone cannot go explore at this age because he/she has to take care of their family, has a very high-paid job that couldn’t sacrifice, or has a stable relationship that everything requires mutual agreement with the companion. I am none of those. So I have the token for this adventurous ride, enjoy the most out of it and go for the things you want while you still can.

I am just twenty-seven going on a new land
Baby, it’s time to change
Better be there, be ready and mindful

At the age of 27, I wish that I could find my new career path, get on the track to financial freedom, everyone I know can stay healthy, the pandemic ends soon. The advice I will give to my future self is — keep considering the opportunity cost of life, if it is low, then there’s nothing to stop you from doing it. If it’s high, then you should prioritize what you can sacrifice and what you cannot.

So what’s next after the quarter-life crisis?
Blog more — on different topics, on thoughts
Drive more — practice my driving skill, drive like a cool dude
Keep fit — do exercise & diet control

– “After The Quarter-Life Crisis, What’s Next?” from Three Chillbees

“May the Force be with you, and the odds be ever in your favour.”